Last friday, one old friend called (finally) after 1year in sabbatical "mood". He got a divorce. He said he couldn't be longer talk in the same language with his ex. Everything started perfect. Falling in love at the first sight, then fate brought them to the 2nd meeting, bla bla bla bla bla bla. They got married, have a baby girl. But then, after sometimes, all the nightmares started. He told me stories how things started to be worst in his life.
He called to tell me that he remembered my comment about his ex. I did warn him long before that he needs to understand her 'language' without imposing only his. And he admitted that he has tried but failed. He just could not bear it anymore to understand all the 'touchy' feelings, 'compulsory cuddling', 'crystal tearbox' etc, for the rest of his life. Marriage became no longer enjoyable. Then, they decided to get divorce, though this hurt many people. I did not speak at all when he told the stories. I know how hard this for him.
Is this really something we can avoid before getting hurt?
For the last couple days, I've been going out with boys. I noticed a difference in myself. I am more relax and (suprisingly) more of being myself. Seems that we speak in the 'same' language. The language that both parties know when to speak and what topics no need to be talked, but just accept it. The language that has to be 'right on the money' and 'three strikes you're out'.
This doesn't means that I don't like going out with girls, but it's just different. I think better to balance this both.
